mary van milligen

As a high school teacher, I incessantly find myself asking the question “why?”  Sometimes I ask it when I see another bureaucratic decision hoist itself into my planning, and I sarcastically utter the “why?”, sometimes I find myself saying it under my breath in certain meetings, shaking my head, and defeatedly allow it to enter my stream of consciousness, but I find that the most important moment in acknowledging the “why?” occurs when I work with my students.

Are we pausing enough during the school year to really see our students and ask this question to understand their choices?  If not, I hope we could do more to consciously witness and listen. Are we taking enough time to pierce through the shield of facade that students build by the time they get to the high school classroom? To me, they are still children learning to navigate their turbulent canoe in a tumultuous stream of perception versus reality.  But their oars are heavy with hormones and social media fulfillments that steer them in the wrong direction.  Are we projecting enough guidance from the lighthouse to lead them ashore without damaging them?

It’s our job to try to understand the why so that we model the most important trait we need them to learn…empathy.  It’s our job to stop our own judgement from shadowing the chance to help a kid that we otherwise might write off as difficult or lazy.  It’s why we went into teaching because we knew it was part of the job.

Do you see what I see?  Are you trying enough to answer the why in people?  When we don’t take a beat to do this, the rhythm of opportunity for a kid will rest.   When you let yourself do this to find more clarity for your students, you will enjoy hearing what I hear.